A tag team effort, thanks to Ant and Jacqui for writing up all the “facts” of the weekend in this 2 part page turner!

Ant:

Our country needs a truly great team, and we need a truly great team now. We need a team that can bring back titles can bring back our medals can bring back our victories, can take care of Will’s Hammers, Will’s Hammers have been abandoned. Seven of us went to Warwick and we were going to make Brixton Great Again. We were going to be the greatest team that God ever created – I tell you that.

I’m here today to update the Brixton people on the progress we’ve made – in such a short space of time – such incredible progress – at Warwick Windoors. The press has become – so dishonest that if we don’t talk about it we are doing an incredible disservice to the Brixton people. But I know words, I have the best words. I have the best – so good – and this is the best report – ever – period – the best.

Brixton vs Mexican Horsebandits (LossWin*)

The corrupt TCs put us against some bad hombres – SAD. But we had the best first game – it was the best – and we won. Some people – dishonest people – afterwards said we lost – but here’s the alternative fact – we won, the best win – so good.

I love the Mexican people but the Horsebandits our not our friends. They’re bringing breaks, they’re bringing picks, they’re tall. And some, I assume, are nice people.

We were becoming break infested – so many breaks, breaks are becoming cheaper than candy bars. But we cut them out. And I got a point block. They said that I had tiny hands, but look you can see – they’re not tiny – in fact they’re the biggest hands, the biggest hands and they got the point-block – and it was such a good point block – some reports said it was the best point block. That’s what people are saying – the best, that’s what I hear.

And we won the spirit game too – we were so good. Some really dishonest people afterwards were saying that our triangle wasn’t equilateral and that it had four sides – so dumb, such dumb people, all triangles have four sides.

Brixton vs Some Bears Alumni Team (LossWin*)

We did lots of different things and we did lots of really good work. We lost – it was the best lost – the loss was so good, so good that actually some people were actually saying that we won, I know – so good. The score was real, the news is fake because so much of the news is fake – but the score was real.

Brixton vs Bears (3-8) – (Best win)

I don’t think there’s ever been a team who in this short period of time has done what we’ve done, because the people get it, much of the media doesn’t get it, they get it but they don’t write it. But we made some incredible progress – just incredible. We won – we had the best win. We scored – and they were the best scores – so good, such good scores, the press don’t want to tell you – but they were the best scores. We built a wall – and it was the best wall – and who paid for the wall – they said we couldn’t do but guess what folks we did it – the bears paid for the wall. Some people were so surprised that we had a Hard D  – but that’s what Jon’s been talking about for a year-un-half – Hard D, they’re so surprised, ooh you had a Hard D, but that’s what we’ve been talking about … to the press … to everybody else. I saw reports – such dishonest reporting – by the dishonest media, that has published one false story after another – with no sources – even though they pretend to have them – they make-em-up in many case – saying such unfair things about our wall, that some bears got through our wall – such dishonesty – so sad. Didn’t happen folks, fake news, we won, and it was the best win and we’re making Brixton Great Again.

Brixton vs Bears (3-8) (LossWin*)

I turn on the tv, I read the newspapers and I see stories of chaos – chaos? Yet it is the exact opposite. This team is running like a fine tuned machine. Tomorrow they’ll say – Brixton rants and raves at Warwick Bears (3?) team. We’re not ranting and raving, we’re just telling you, you know you’re dishonest people but but we’re not ranting and raving, I love this, we’re having a good time, we’re having a good time doing it.

They said we lost. The score was rigged – so sad and its so sad. But we still won the most spirit college votes, they said we couldn’t do it, they said we could reach 250, they said 270 was – nope, nahah, not gonna happen, but we got 305 folks, it was the biggest spirit college vote since Ronald Reagan. But they rigged the score – yep I know sad, I mean there were 3 million illegal scores. When you have people who are dead, or people who are registered to score in two teams and they’re scoring for both – you know somethings up. Everyone’s talking about Russia, and whether Russia hacked the scoreboard or whether Russia was mean but no one’s talking about the rigged system – so sad.

 

*Indicates Alternative Facts

 

Jacqui:

And so to Sunday, which is as much a blur now as it was that morning…

Yes, we’re Brixton, so yes, we went and won at the party. This did however, mean that our first game was a little bit of a shock to the system.

We were pitted against Coventry Firebirds. We knew from watching them the day before that we would be in for a high intensity game and they didn’t disappoint. They were nifty and managed to find the spaces that slowly started to creep into our zone. Despite our best efforts, they made a convincing with. Coventry Firebirds (6) v Brixton (1).

Time to wake up.

Our second game of the day saw us face the Ninja Frispeas, a fairly inexperienced beginners team, but one with a whole load of potential. We took the opportunity of this match to work on our man D. Great positioning and committed D meant that we forced a lot of turns. When we did turn it we initiated ‘our’ game; chilly and considered Frisbee. Brixton took the game 13 v 0.

This game was also brilliant for the fact that we finally got to play Ninja. A great call if you ask me and whoever thought to use the opportunity of us playing a team with Ninja in their name to suggest it, is clearly a genius…

Ordinarily at this point, I would continue and get straight onto to telling you about the third game, but that wouldn’t be right, because that’s not how our day went, because we ended up with a two and a half hour break… Time for the annual Windoors trip to Costa!

As per usual it was eventful; we found out that Matt isn’t a fan of a good old sex joke (boo!), that if the ‘Act it out’ round of Heads Up is actually pretty challenging and also that I am more than capable of consuming my own body weight in sandwiches.

The time soon came around to head back to the sports hall to get warmed up for our next game and as it did, so did the time that for us to bid farewell to Ant once again. We saw him leave to jet back to Lebanon, to carry on saving the world. I think he knows just how much we’ll miss him.

For our third game, we faced Bears 5. A closely fought match in which we traded points throughout. Playing against this team who have such a well drilled flood, gave us a chance to showcase just how patient we can be on the disc when we need to be. It came right down to the last couple of minutes, but Bears 5 took it 3 v 2. I think with just a little more aggression against the flood, the score could have easily gone the other way.

Our final game was against Bears 4 and gathered a pretty big crowd out on the main pitch (we are a big deal). It was such a great game to end the tournament on! After practising our zone all weekend, it had become a well-oiled machine and if facilitated several turns as well as the slowing down of the offence as they approached the endzone. Despite this and some impressive flow from us, we were just pipped to the post. Bears 4 win 6 v 5.

Our umpteenth year at Windoors was just as fun as the last and provided us with a lot of food for thought as we approach Open and Women’s Nats :)

Some notable performances came from:

MSP- Jon! Captain spirit, always handling other teams in a respectful manner and always keeping our heads up.

MIP- Angie! Always free when you need her as well as a safe pair of hands.

MVP- Matt! As reliable as they come, when it comes to handlers and always great in the air, when he jumped he always came down with the disc!

Thanks for a fantastic weekend, see you all in Warwick next year!

JQ

 

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